ADVISORY:
The Funny Jokes, Quotes, And Sayings On This Website
Contain Anti-Depressive Material


ADVISORY:
These Funny Jokes, Quotes, And Sayings Contain Anti-Depressive Material.

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Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1


Jokes Of The Day, #2

Jokes Of The Day, #2

There's Always A Bright Side

Three Minnesotans died and found themselves in hell. They were actually happy to be in hell because they were finally warm.

But Satan doesn't like his souls to be happy. So he lowered the thermostat all the way down, and hell froze over.

Then the Minnesotans were ecstatic, because that meant the Vikings had finally won the Super Bowl.



Funny Saying Of The Day

Funny Saying Of The Day


Jokes Of The Day, #3

Jokes Of The Day, #3

Confession Lesson

One afternoon while he was hearing confessions, a priest was notified of an emergency. Since there were no other priests on duty, he asked his friend the rabbi across the street to fill in for him for an hour. The rabbi protested that he would have no idea what to do, but the priest said it was easy and he would show him how it works.


So they both squeezed into the confessional, and soon a man came in for confession. He said, “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.”


The priest said, “What was the nature of your sin?”


He replied, “I have committed adultery.”


The priest asked him how many times, and he said, “Five times.”


The priest said, “Put ten dollars in the collection box, say five Hail Marys, and sin no more.”


The next person came in, a woman, and said, “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.”


The priest asked, “What kind of sin?”


The woman said, “I’m an adulteress.” 
The priest asked how many times she committed adultery and and she replied, “Five times.”


The priest said, “Put ten dollars in the collection box, say five Hail Marys, and sin no more.”


The rabbi sees how this is working, and tells the priest he he can handle it.


So the priest left and the rabbi was alone in the confessional.


Soon a man came in and said, “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.”


The rabbi said, “What is it you have done, exactly?”


The man replied, “I committed adultery.”


The rabbi asked him how many times, and the man said, “Twice.”


The rabbi said, “Go and do it three more times. We have a special this week, five for ten dollars.”




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Funny Comeback Of The Day

Funny Comeback Of The Day

Pierre Trudeau, after learning Richard Nixon had called him an a--hole:

"I've been called worse things by better men."


Funny Quote Of The Day

Funny Quote Of The Day

Having a government that is for the people and by the people is on my bucket list.
- Andy Borowitz


Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

A gentleman is someone who knows how to play bagpipes but doesn't.
- Pierre Desproges, French humorist


Funny Jokes Of The Day #4:

A Major Disappointment...


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