ADVISORY:
The Funny Jokes, Quotes, And Sayings On This Website Contain Anti-Depressive Material

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1

OXYMORON  OR  IRONY?

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #2

Marriage Conversation

Henry was reading an article about a gorgeous supermodel marrying a professional wrestler famous for his anti-social behavior, his acting out, and constantly mangling the English language.

He turned to his wife and said, “I’ll never understand how the biggest idiots and jerks get the most beautiful wives.”

She replied, “Why, thank you Honey.”

Funny Saying Of The Day

Jokes Of The Day, #3

You're In The Army Now

The rugged old sergeant had been pretty rough on young Private Jones for several months. One day he snarled at the private, “I’ll bet that once you’re out of this army you’ll just be waiting for me to die so you can come back and spit on my grave.”

“NO WAY,” said the private. Once I get out of here I’m never going to stand in line again.”

Funny Comeback Of The Day

Yogi Berra told Derek Jeter to stop swinging at terrible pitches.

Jeter replied, “But you swung at 'em.”

“Yeah,” Yogi said, “but I hit ’em.”

Funny Quote Of The Day

"If you're going to kick authority in the teeth, you might as well use two feet."
- Keith Richards

Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base."
- Dave Barry

Funny Jokes Of The Day #4:

Congratulations!

You’ve stumbled into the most comical collection of funny jokes, funny quotes, and funny sayings on the planet. Think of it as your Gateway to Big Fun.

No need to slog through dozens of joke sites. The best are right here, whenever you need a hit of humor.

WARNING:  The jokes, quotes and sayings on this website exceed humor safety standards and could cause you to squirt latte out your nose.

Click the menu buttons at top for all the categories of jokes, funny quotes, and funny sayings.

OR - for a list of every page, alphabetized by subject, visit the Sitemap.

Feel free to Share,Tweet, Like, or Comment on this page with the easy buttons below and at left.

ADVERTISING ON JOKEQUOTE
For single or multi-page sponsorships,
Contact me here

ShareFacebookTwitterPinterestTumblrRedditWhatsAppMessenger