These Funny Jokes, Quotes, and Sayings Could Make You Squirt Latte out Your Nose.

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #2

Furniture Business

O’Malley, a furniture importer in Cork, Ireland, traveled to France looking for new, exotic pieces for his business. After placing several orders, he stopped at an upscale club for a drink and some music.

After awhile, a very attractive young woman came and sat in the seat next to him. O’Malley couldn’t speak French, so he took out his pen and drew a wine glass on a napkin. He showed it to her, she nodded, and he ordered her some wine.

A bit later, O’Malley did his best to draw a picture of a plate of food, she nodded, and he ordered dinner.

After they finished eating, he drew a picture of two people dancing. She nodded, and they danced.

When they came back and sat down, the beautiful young woman drew a picture of a four-poster bed. She showed it to him, and smiled seductively.

O’Malley was astounded. He still wonders how she ever figured out that he was a furniture dealer.

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #3

Medical Lab

An angry man called the medical lab, shocked at the high costs on his bill. He insisted on a description of each and every lab test he was charged for.

The phone receptionist replied, “Okay, number one, urinalysis...”

The irate man cut her off: “I’m a what?

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Funny Comeback Of The Day

Lady Astor to Winston Churchill:  
"If you were my husband, I'd put poison in your coffee."  

Winston Churchill to Lady Astor:
"If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

Funny Quote Of The Day

Laughter is like an enema for the soul.
- Robin Williams

Funny Saying Of The Day

It's bad luck to be superstitious.

Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

Just because nobody complains doesn’t mean all parachutes are perfect.
- Benny Hill

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #4:


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