The Funny Jokes, Quotes, And Sayings On This Website
Contain Anti-Depressive Material

These Funny Jokes, Quotes, And Sayings Contain Anti-Depressive Material.

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1

Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1

Jokes Of The Day, #2

Jokes Of The Day, #2

Marriage Counseling

A married couple go to a therapist for counseling. The wife starts the session, ranting, raving, and complaining about every promise her husband has not fulfilled during their 20 years of marriage.

When she finally stops, the therapist gets up, walks around his desk, pulls the wife to her feet, and kisses her passionately for a full minute.

The wife is stunned and glassy-eyed.

The therapist looks at the husband and says, “That is exactly what your wife needs, preferably three times a week.”

The husband replies, “Well, Mondays and Wednesdays would work, but on Fridays I play golf, so she’ll have to take the bus.”

Funny Saying Of The Day

Funny Saying Of The Day

Jokes Of The Day, #3

Jokes Of The Day, #3

Whirlwind Romance

At the 60th high school reunion, Max and Judy, a widow and widower, were seated at the same table. They hadn’t dated each other back in school, but they remembered each others’ names.

They had a fun night talking, dancing, and sharing life stories.

The final dance was a slow song: Elvis’ “I Can’t Help Falling In Love With You.” Max was overcome with emotion, mustered up his courage, and asked Judy to marry him.

Her eyes lit up and she said yes.

The next morning, Max was a little foggy. Did he ask Judy to marry him, or did he dream it? And did she say yes, or no?

So he summoned up his courage and called her.

He explained his predicament, and asked Judy if he had asked her to marry him, and if so what her answer was.

Judy said yes, he had asked her to marry him. And that her answer had been yes. And her answer was still yes!

And she was so grateful for his call. Because when she woke up this morning she couldn’t remember who had asked her.

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Funny Comeback Of The Day

Funny Comeback Of The Day

Peter Marshall:
Eddie Fisher recently stated, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for them both.” Who or what was he referring to?

Paul Lynde:
His fans.

Funny Quote Of The Day

Funny Quote Of The Day

If you can keep your head when all around you have lost theirs, then you probably haven't understood the seriousness of the situation.
- David Brent

Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

Funny One-Liner Joke Of The Day

White House Rejects Supremacist Label: “No One Has Done More Than Trump to Prove White People Are Not Superior”
- Borowitz Report (The New Yorker)

Funny Jokes Of The Day #4:


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WARNING:  The jokes, quotes and sayings on this website exceed humor safety standards and could cause you to squirt latte out your nose.

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