Funny Jokes Of The Day, #1
Funny Jokes Of The Day, #2
A New Jersey woman’s car overheated in a lonely part of the New Mexico desert. Stranded, she was relieved when an American Indian rode by on a horse and offered to take her into the nearest town.
He helped her up behind him on the horse and off they rode at a gallop.
She was glad to get a ride, but was startled every couple of minutes when the Indian emitted an earth-shattering “Yaaaa Heeeaaa!”
They got into town and he dropped her off at the local mechanic with one more “Yaaaa Heeeaaa!” and was gone.
The mechanic asked, “I’ve never seen that Indian so excited. What the heck did you do to him?”
The woman said, “I didn’t do anything. I just sat behind him on the horse with my arms around his waist. We were going so fast I hung on for dear life to the saddle horn.”
“Lady," the mechanic said, "Indians don’t use saddles.”
Two guys are mountain climbing when they're surprised by a huge grizzly bear. One guy bends over and starts tying his shoes. The other guy is confused.
“What are you doing?” the second guy asks. “You’ll never outrun that grizzly.”
“I don’t have to outrun the grizzly,” says the first guy. “I just have to outrun you.”
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Father: Are you getting smart with me?
Son: How would you know?
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
- Joe Weinstein
Men have two emotions: hungry and horny, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
In her book, Dolly Parton confessed that she had breast lift surgery. I bet it felt good to get that off her chest.
- Melanie White
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